"She loves me, she loves me not, or he loves me, he loves me not." Daisies always remind me of this flower petal game. Our love boundaries are where our generosity ends and another's responsibility begins. It is that place where affection is exchanged in a healthy, mutually supportive way.
An understanding of boundaries is a necessary component to loving and being loved—to knowing and being known—to intimacy. Our love boundaries let others know where we desire to connect. They reveal that zone— that sweet spot—where it feels great to be us and to be connected with others.
Love boundaries let others know our pace for loving and being loved. They are the acknowledgment of our desires, a mission statement of sorts, that lets others know what we desire to give, to receive and to share in a relationship. Vulnerability is required for setting boundaries because it takes vulnerability, honesty and love to share how we desire to be treated and to admit when someone’s treatment has overstepped a boundary.
In our effort to connect we might overstep a boundary, come up shy of one, overlook a boundary violation, over react to one, overcompensate or lose ourselves completely. Our desires for connection change as we do. This is why some friends are for a reason, others for a season and a rare few for a lifetime.
This is a rough excerpt from the book I am currently working on. Feedback anyone?
Happy boundary hunting!
Dr. Trish
I love it Dr.Trish! I love the way you write, very poetic. I would LOVE a love boundary case study to really drive your content home with a story that my mind and heart can grab a hold of long after reading your beautiful content.
thank you!
This is so apprapo in all types of relationships; be it family, friends, significant love, or co-
workers. Spring brings so much promise on all levels. Thaks for this gentle reminder called
boundaries.
Good spiritual conveying, Trisha.
Blessings,
Joyce
Love it, as usual so well said. I love thinking about this concept and the idea of 'come up shy on one', usually I think of people or myself overstepping a boundary through violation or over reaction but never thought about it as 'shy of one'.
Hugs to you!