Interview with Gail Cannon from Earthsong Yoga Studio
Boundary-Asana with a Valentine Twist workshop with Dr. Trish at Earthsong Yoga Studio, Marlboro, MA
What brought you to teaching these types of workshops on boundaries?
What prompted me was when our daughter and her husband got a dog. I was talking with a friend about the challenges of flattened flowerbeds and rope burns and how when I finally had “the conversation” that it had been so healing and brought us closer. Through my sharing I realized how little people knew about boundaries, how much stress could be avoided by enforcing them and how ‘I’ even dragged my feet prior to having “the conversation.”
I realized how the same situation that could create distance could just as easily deepen intimacy and illustrate integrity based on how it was handled. I strive for intimacy and integrity so I wanted to master boundary setting. I read about it, wrote about it, practiced it and eventually began teaching it. I run into my fears sometimes just like everyone else, but I'm on the path and compassionate with the process.
What is your background?
I have been practicing holistic counseling for 12 years and I began my practice of boundary setting 19 years ago. A breach of trust sent me in search of understanding. I wasn't so graceful at first, but I know how to get there now. Trial, error and humility are amazing teachers. My title is Doctor of C.O.R.E. Education, which is the approach I use along with meditation and work with the Mineral Kingdom to help my clients eliminate the root of their problems.
Who should attend this workshop, and what will they receive?
Parents, spouses, boyfriends, girlfriends, adult children, pet owners, teachers, managers—anyone who takes loving and relationships seriously. They will learn:
- my perspective on boundaries
- how boundaries can deepen intimacy
- how to draw people closer without even trying
- how to enjoy and be enjoyed rather than be used
- how to respect and be respected rather than underappreciated
Why do we have boundaries, what are they, are they needed in every situation?
We have boundaries so that we can have healthy, thriving relationships rather than codependent ones.
Boundaries are not at all what most people think. They are made up of desires not defenses. They are about loving and being loved at a pace that is comfortable for us. They are where one person's generosity ends and another's responsibility begins. It is likened to the zone for relationships.
Are they needed in every situation? Boundaries are part of the art of being true to oneself. When being true to ourselves is something we strive for across the board, consistent boundaries are our ally.
As with the practice of yoga, the practice of boundaries opens us up in ways we didn’t even know were possible. We don’t need yoga or boundaries to survive, but they certainly help us to thrive.
To develop boundaries what do we need to do? or not do?
Setting boundaries can be likened to a sun salutation in yoga. There is a sequence of steps necessary for setting boundaries. We need to be:
- true to ourselves
- honest with our feelings
- clear about what we want
- ask for what we need in a positive way
We need not be:
- who we think others want us to be
- hiding our feelings
- wishy-washy about what is important to us
Having the boundaries necessary to remain true to oneself and the knowhow to address conflict with emotional maturity deepens intimacy, draws the right people together and keeps the spark shining brightly in relationships.