The Health Spiral: How far have you ventured from yourself?

The Health Spiral: How far have you ventured from yourself?


When there is discord in my life of any kind, cleansing the fear out of how I operate is what provides the relief.

One of my clients is struggling with some health issues and it has sent me back to retrace my own steps from health issues past. Hindsight always provides some 20/20 so to follow are my findings from this stroll down memory lane.

As I thought about my prior health issues as messengers, I had this image of a health issue personified. It was an overly excited boy knocking at my door. I pictured him running for miles to get a message to me. By the time he finds me he's animated, out of breath and speaking gibberish. It freaks me out, not only because he’s a stranger, but because I thought everything was fine yet here stands a babbling youngster trying to tell me otherwise. And that’s if I even open the door.

In the early days I thought this crazy kid was a troublemaker so I’d call in special forces covered under my HMO to get him off my property (medicate, radiate or surgically remove him).

I had traveled so far off course from being true to myself, from my soul’s plan, from my life’s purpose (various phrases with universal meaning) which was why he had to travel so far and his message was so urgent, but at the time I could only view him as a blubbering idiot. I would find this ‘disturbed’ youth to be an irritation to my blissfulness. But in hindsight I was the disturbed one, my bliss was really my ignorance and he was a Godsend.

When I couldn’t get him off my property, I started opening the door a crack in an attempt to calm him down (physical therapy, chiropractic, acupuncture, energy work). Once calm he’d want to chat about my living and loving. But I was too anxious to get back on the track that had gotten me sick so I’d pop a pacifier in his mouth, shut the door and go on my merry, ignorant way.

Traveling further still from my God-given self, my center, my authenticity I'd eventually encounter another messenger or another visit from this one.

Why?

Because the pacifier was obstructing the message to change my self-destructive tendencies that were causing me to stray from my center. I hadn’t cleansed the fear out of my motives.

Like what?

Like sacrificing my needs and desires in order to remain connected to ‘loved’ ones. If they weren’t asking, I was volunteering. I was operating out of fear-of-loss rather than love. It was my autopilot so I wasn’t even conscious of it at the time, but that didn't mean that it was harmless as my health was indicating. Sacrificing our needs and desires as a means for maintaining connections in family, friendship, intimate or business relationships can only leave us with a heavy heart.

My condition improved with alternative health care. It was a Godsend even, but over time I came to feel like a slave to the 'maintenance' care and even became skeptical of its value. That was my cue to voluntarily open the door, remove the pacifier and start dialoguing.

Can we live with abandon if our modus operandi is to pacify and outsmart our messengers? Can we truly live if our motivator is fear-of-loss and fear-of-death? Whatever path to wellness you choose, traditional or alternative, don't forget to face your fears too. To do what you must in order to have your choices come from a place of love for your life at the risk of losing connection rather than at the risk of losing your health. When you are authentic the connections that remain will be the authentic ones. 

How do I change course?

Begin by slowing down and asking yourself 3 questions: 

  1. What am I about to say or do?
  2. Why am I about to say or do it?
  3. Am I coming from a place of fear or love?

When it is fear, explore what you are fearing and why. Unresolved issues from our past may surface for revisiting. A therapist or counselor can help with revealing autopilots and with closure of the past. Operating out of love will take practice so when you put yourself out there, expect that sometimes it will be fear-of-loss in disguise. And when it is, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, go back to the drawing board, and try again with your more genuine findings. Maintenance healthcare was Godsend for this period too. When you've got love down, you'll know it and feel it with your whole heart and soul and be able to apply what you've learned to other areas of your life that are ready for re-authenticating.

The further we stray from our centers the easier it is to blame our symptoms for our discord rather than thank them for being our personal GPS device, the boy who tracked us down to guide us home to the land of milk and honey—that place where it feels great to be us and our world reflects our prosperity.

Being our authentic selves is easier said than done at times but once we learn how to take a washcloth to our fears, it is the easiest course of all, the healthiest, most noble and most abundant one.

If you have utilized a health issue as a springboard into more authentic living you will know exactly what I am talking about. And if you haven't it might be time to give it a try.

And in case you were wondering, I made that spiral with my ice skates. :-)

Enjoy the journey,
Dr. Trish

P.S. "Enlightenment doesn't mean that your car will never break down, but if it does you'll be close to a gas station." ~Unknown

Comments

  1. Mike says:

    It's reassuring to hear I am not alone wondering about if my actions out of love are sometimes fear of loss in disguise.

    Great article.

    Mike

    P.S. You might have created a whole new form of art, born from ice skates!

    Reply
    1. Trish Whynot says:

      Sometimes the only way to know the difference is by the results down the road which helps us to be more forgiving and compassionate all around.

      And skateable ice with a dusting of snow on top is a rarity. I made an abundance of spirals. Next time nature provides me with a blank canvas I'll have to try other designs. Thanks for the suggestion and thanks for commenting!

      Reply
  2. Helen Thorgalsen says:

    I LOVE LOVE LOVE this...wow, the personification of the sickness as something more than just darkness but as a messenger with a voice.

    Reply
    1. Trish Whynot says:

      Thanks Helen!

      Reply

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